Morning sickness has started kicking in...why was I looking forward to this again? 'Morning sickness' is a complete misnomer, it is more like 'all day sickness'. Suddenly your sense of smell becomes a lot more acute, and smells you didn't even notice before suddenly become absolutely repugnant. In my case, its the smell of alcohol (Coyote has to brush his teeth after having a beer at the pub) and the smell of some unwashed dishes in the sink (I would wash them, but approaching the sink makes me feel too ill), I'm hoping those are the only smells that will set me off. Its kind of like being hungover, but without the fun night before.
More fun pregnancy side effects so far are that I'm massively irritable, things just upset me and anger me a lot more than normal, I'm having arguments with my partner over things that normally wouldn't bother me much at all, I'm also getting very very weepy. watching a film of a cute baby doing something silly on YouTube nearly had me in tears, which is just plain embarrassing. I am also getting very sore breasts and nipples, both of which are getting bigger (I already look like a porn star and its only week 5-6!!! how the hell will I look by month 9!!!). as for my skin! I look like I'm a teenager again. I want pregnant lady glow already damnit!
Normally I smoke, not a huge amount, but maybe a couple a day, as soon as I found out I was pregnant I completely quit smoking, but now I'm getting some really vivid dreams when I light up, finish the cigarette and then suddenly remember that I'm pregnant and feel horribly guilty. I have to admit though, apart from odd dreams I'm dealing with my cravings surprisingly well, giving up caffeine is being a bigger problem than drinking and smoking. Though me and Coyote are getting married next year (after the baby has arrived) and the thought of doing a hen night and wedding with no alcohol is kind of depressing, but I don't want to drink and breast feed.
I wonder if I should be telling people that I'm pregnant, so far I'm pretty much keeping it a secret, I've told my mum and dad and a small handful of really close friends (the friends I told partly because we meet up every week in the evening and they knew we were trying for a baby, so even without me telling them, suddenly switching to decaff coffee would have been a bit of a give away.) I'm just torn between being massively excited and wanting to tell the world, and not wanting to get everyone's hopes up in case I do end up miscarrying again, last time I waiting till 12 weeks before announcing it to the world, and then I found out from the dating scan that the baby had died already...it was heart breaking trying to re-break the news to people. Also a part of me is just so much more apprehensive about this pregnancy, I don't want to tell people and get everyone all excited, to have that heart break again.
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